Aviva 70.30 is just two days away

My supposed feeling should be excited at this moment but no more. I thought i be feeling sore and bad about not racing but surprisingly i am not. I have been eating well and sleeping well. LOL…

I am not giving up on these sports just because of this minor incident. I be back to my usual routine soon. In fact, i have already resumed. I did my first “LSD” 9.3K @ 47.30mins. Think to hit 48mins for 10K seem impossible for me at this moment but i will worked toward it.

Swimming tonight and i better not be lazy. I have to swim because tomorrow i be going to the hairdresser and after that, normally i will not be swimming. Hope to do some biking on sun too…

I am happier now…:)

Today, i managed to do something that i adore. That is so stress – free. I feel happier today.

Thinking back, in fact is a blessing in disguise. Maybe my body is really too tired. After couple day of resting, i feel good. My appetite is coming back. For the past two days, i can’t eat at all. I am so bothered by it. I keep thinking about it over and over, again and again. I keep asking why i am the one. Why am i so suay?? I keep scolding myself..

Like what coach say- we all must learn from mistake. Each mistake had a reason. The most important thing is to learn to fall and also learn to pick yourself up.

Coach already says Desaru is waiting for you. Lots of races is waiting. Is only you want to go or not. I know what he wants… He only aiming for the seafood after the race. LOL. He says this is the most stressless race. Just complete. No cut off time. 11 hours also like tt..hahaha..So funny. If one person can take 11 hours to complete a 70.30, then he must be a record breaker.. Hahaha.  See how ba.. See if my gut is back or not. If yes, i might do it.. We don’t know what will happen tomorrow, right

I called it quit

After weeks of hesitating, i decided that since the wounds are not getting any better. I shall get it quit.

After the fall. i can’t sleep well cause everytime when i try to sleep at the injured position, i just wake up again. How to get good sleep? Anyway, i have cried enough and maybe is fated that things turn out in this way.

I have to pick myself up and move on. I keep consoling myself with all the “nevermind la, is just a race etc…” But is the months of effort that i have put it in is simply too much.

Hopefully, i can get this over and shall have a good night sleep. *Praying Hard.*

Anyhow Thoughts

Yesterday, i did my swim again. Once again, i managed to do 35.05mins for 1.5km and 48.00mins for 2.0km. Why so inconsistent??

Doing a half ironman is never an easy thing. Not only you will be physically affected but will mentally as well. This feeling, you can never tell it to people who do not do sports. When you try telling them, their reply will be no one asks you to do it, right. You have yourself to ask for it… Can’t be more encouraging meh.

Thou my beloved mentor SC had again n again assure me that i be fine but i am just scared. He asked me to get rid of that fear thoughts. Nothing to be afraid of, he says. SC had been an ironman for countless times and he did double of what i be doing. Today, he told me that the oldest participant @ Langkawi Ironman is 73 years old. Despite the age, the old man did 14 hours over… Amazing. He must be damn strong.

I must brace myself to face it. Anyway, is my choice to enter this race and i can’t regret but to look forward. Many times, i feel like breaking down and let go but i think of mummy Shawn. She is really my idol. Thou she might not have the speed but her endurance is greatly unbeatable. Salute her.

So nothing to scare, nothing to fear, ok..just go ahead with it…

During weekends, i have to wake up as easy as 3 plus in the morning. Reason for doing so is to avoid heavy traffic. See how consider am i … LOL

Protected: Filled with uncertain and doubts

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